I’d forgotten how exhausting a newborn could be. Alexander’s younger brother, Daniel was born November 17 and has been keeping me very busy. I barely have time to sleep much less do things like update my blog.
I’ve been so tired, I don’t think I’ve really had a chance to process my feelings about Alexander’s anniversary. It’s hard to believe Alexander has been gone 3 years. On his anniversary date, we spent a quiet day at home and went to cemetery in the afternoon.
Recently, a friend asked me if it gets any easier. I told her I don’t think it gets easier. Alexander’s loss has become part of me and is something I must deal with on a daily basis. Some days are better than others. Now that Daniel has arrived, I’m trying to find a balance between being happy for the child that I have here with me and being sad and missing the child that is gone.
I talk to Daniel about Alexander and we look at pictures of him. I think Alexander and Daniel would have been great friends and I wish my boys could have grown up together.