I awoke early this morning from another restless, dreamless night. Seeing that it was still before 8am, I decided to stay in bed and try to sleep a little longer. For the first time, in a while, I did have a dream: Dan and I were at the hospital and trying to make plans when I walked over to look at Alexander’s body. I saw it move. Not believing it, I waited a few seconds and saw more movement. I went to get Dan to show him and when I returned, Alexander was sitting up in the bed. He smiled, held up his arms and said Mommy. As I walked over to him, he kissed me and gave me a hug. I know it was only a dream but I felt like my little boy was communicating with me, letting me know he is ok and sending his love to me.
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I am so sorry for your loss and hope you will find SUDC group give you strength to carry on live a bit easier. First week after Claire die that I remeber I went to lay down(John was walking the dog without her pram)and I had this vision that hospital made a huge mistake and she was not dead but she can’t get out the fridge in where they stored the ” dead body section”….somehow I cried for help but no one understand me then I wake up……. cold cold June weather.I guess we all so want to have them back to our arms. 1st Christmas, new year…..etc without our angels is so hard. anyways English is not my native language but the grief is the same… so please go to you tube to see this song ” La Claire fontaine”please take care and be gentle to youself.We are here for you….